Loneliness

 

People often choose to spend time alone and find it pleasurable and positive, but loneliness is not the same as being alone.  LONELINESS IS DIFFERENT. Loneliness can produce feelings of anxiety, worthlessness and a lack of motivation.  These feelings can affect a person’s ability to develop healthy relationships. 

...loneliness is not the same as being alone.  LONELINESS IS DIFFERENT.

People can experience loneliness for many reasons and life events can trigger feelings of loneliness.  Divorce, loss of a relationship, relocation to a new city, job loss or transfers, can leave a person with profound feelings of loneliness.  

 

Loneliness can occur within relationships where there is anger, resentment, or when love is not given, acknowledged or shown.  Loneliness can be situational (divorce, moving), developmental (lack of intimacy), or internal (including feelings of low self-esteem or vulnerability).  

 

When people feel lonely they can believe “everyone else has friends” or “there must be something wrong with me”.

 

Loneliness can play a part in alcoholism; can have a negative effect on learning and sleeping, can lead to feelings of depression. There are many descriptions of loneliness such as:

 

A feeling of not having a bond with people around you

Feeling disconnected from others

Feeling there is no one in your life who really cares

Feeling left out

 

How Therapy Can Help

 

A therapist can help you understand the causes of your problem.  You may have negative thoughts, feelings, and beliefs that can be addressed and better understood.  You and your therapist can explore alternative approaches to your daily living, your beliefs, and your behaviors allowing you to become more available to those around you.

 

Communication styles, which often contribute to loneliness, also can be addressed in therapy.  

Other factors, such as childhood experiences and your family’s style of interacting, may also have lead to your feelings of loneliness.

Anxiety can also be a cause for loneliness and your therapist can help you reduce anxious thoughts and negative feelings resulting in your having a richer, healthier, life and nurturing relationships with others.